Dhv Wwl Shvrt
by Paul Stought
I’m lwking at a shvrt on dhv waul uv mie bedroom.
It iz red and blak wwl.
Rips in dhv sleevz,
and nekst to dhv bvtunz.
Bvtun hoelz so worn dhat dhae looz dheir grip on dhv bvtunz.
I liek to wer dhis shvrt when dhv tempuruchur iz 50-60.
Biloe 40 I wer it vndur a liet koet.
Biloe 30 I wer it vndur a hevy koet.
I aulwaez wer vdhur kloedhing vndur dhv wwl uv kors.
Wwl iz unfrendly nekst to dhv skin.
Mie wief asks, “When ar yoo going to throe dhat shvrt uwae?”
She haz bin asking dhat for 5 or 10 yirz nou.
I hav bigvn seeing dhat shvrt az an oeld frend.
A litul kraezy, I udmit.
I hav probubly had dhis shvrt oevur 20 yirz.
Bifoer dhat it bilongd to svmwun els,
bvt it wvz in prity gwd shaep when mie wief found it at a thrift shop.
I had bin lvrning ubout weeving,
which ment I wvz aulsoe lvrning ubout tekstielz and vdhur rilaetud svbjikts.
I liekd dhv propurtyz uv wwl,
so when mie wief sau dhv shvrt at dhv thrift stor,
it jvst seemd to reech out to hvr.
Bvt, nou, I mvst udmit it seemz foolish to keep wering it,
espeshuly sins mie wief baut me a noo wvn.
Saem kvlur.
Bvt svmthing’z rong.
Dhv fabrik iz a litul thinur,
and it feelz a litul stif,
az if it haz bin treetud with svmthing.
It iz not nirly az soft az dhe urijunul.
Not az “frendly”.
So, it haz bin hanging on dhv waul,
nekst to dhe urijunul for sevurul yirz,
seldum being worn.
I hav bigvn wering it in pvblik,
sins it dvzn’t hav terz in it.
I feel gilty leeving dhe urijunul on dhv waul.
Bvt nou I hav bigvn to see boeth shvrts az having feelingz.
So nou, I feel gilty,
whichevur wvn I chooz.
I suspekt a trip to dhv “fvny farm” iz in mie fuechur.
Whot do yoo think? Krymaeshun or landfil?
Maebe we wil meet ugen,
in unvdhur life.
Dhv reedur uv dhis story kan see dhat prezunt reedurz kan eezuly reed dhis tekst. No dout svm wvrdz wil rizvlt in a litul triping bvt dhv mor yoo reed, dhv kwikur dheez insudunts faul uwae.
I ekspekt Mentur’z ues uv v, w and y, az boeth voul and konsununt, wil fiend svm rizistuns, bvt dhae wil not be hard to undurstand. We ar aulredy uezd to y being boeth voul and konsununt; yes, penny, cycle, syllable, acetylene.
Dher hav bin kumplaents ubout uezing u for shwaa, bvt I fiend it wvrks very wel. Moestly bikauz uv speling v az a stresd voul; svn, svmur, pvrpus, inkvr. Moest uv dhv tekst wil be un-TS-liek, so dhis shwd be no mor signifikunt dhan meny vdhur feechurz.
Roolz rimoov moest ambuguutyz.
Svm ambuguutyz ar; siet wvrdz, homufoenz, svm voul kombunaeshunz. Lvrning dhv roolz, ulong with a lot uv reeding, wil help with dheez. Reeding wil stil be eezy, bvt speling wil taek a litul mor stvdy.
Dhv speling aksent wil giv dhv moest trvbul, bvt dhat wil be dhv kaes with eny speling sistum baesd moestly on dhe alfubetik prinsupul. Dhis kan be lvrnd by a lot uv reeding—if yoo kan fiend svmthing to reed. Dher iz a Mentur speling standurd prezuntly on OneDrive. https://1drv.ms/f/s!Ah4m-1OMmzM7wV2FOpZNTRxk5TrB
Doent kount on it staeing dher. Dher iz a svrch windoe nir dhv top left—vndur OneDrive.
Dhv Mentur roolz wil pruvied ansurz to moest kweschunz ubout hou spelingz ar choezun. Moest komun tekst wil be kuvvurd by dhv roolz. Dher wil stil be meny wvrdz wher dhv chois wil be arbutrery, so we wil hav to aksept svm vereubul spelings. Ingglish haz oevur a milyun wvrdz.
https://paulstought.wordpress.com/2013/09/08/7-spelling-accent/
https://paulstought.wordpress.com/2013/09/08/the-mentur-spelling-system/
Paul Stought 